Saturday 15 December 2012

15 years today

It has been 15 years today, i cannot believe it to be honest. 15 years has passed since one of the most beloved people left this world. My mother's aunt, Berta.
She meant the world to me!

It's so weird though, it all happened so fast, you were healthy and suddenly you were gone.
Just a few weeks before it all happened we, mum and i, took her out shopping and she bought a pocket calendar for 1998, but she never got to use it. That was end of November 1997!
Back then i could never imagine she'd leave us.
As both grand parents on my mothers side passed away when i was a toddler, auntie became grandma.

I loved going to her house. I rather spent time in her house than going to our own whenever we went to my mothers hometown.
My mum never understood why i always wanted to go there instead, but what can i say, one of the best people in the world was there!

I remember the day we found out that she'd been taken to hospital, i thought it was a bad joke, and i hoped for her to go home as soon as possible. But she never did.
Mum took me to the hospital and i saw her lying on a bed in this big dark room all alone, with this horribly ugly pajamas on.
She couldn't move, nor speak, she was just lying there.
I think she was in pain, and i still wonder how someone could go from being so healthy to being like a vegetable.

Time passed fast and i never had the time to really say good bye.
I also remember the day she passed away, i was so angry with my mum for not showing up at school as we had a Christmas event.
I was so angry until i saw her sitting with her head down in the kitchen table. That was when she told me...
All my anger turned into confusion.

I didn't have the time to really say goodbye. I never got to say how much she really meant to me.

But i guess God wanted it differently, in away it was goodbye, but i will see her again. Not on this earth but i will see her again!

Today is dedicated to you, Berta♡
I carry you with me everyday in my heart♥

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